This is Africa

AFRICA.

so many things come to mind….

a large continent on the other side of the world
the old-school commercials encouraging others to help feed the hungry children who live there
genocide
AIDS
a people in need
God’s people
beauty
stillness
hope.

My idea of Africa has changed as I explored the land there. I left home to an unknown place with little to no expectations. You see, I didn’t want to get my hopes up as I had on another missions trip I went on in the past. So I left without a clue of what I would see, how God would move and speak, and how I would be forever changed.

While there, the Lord really gave me a tunnel-visioned mindset of the “here and now”…the sentence “you are IN Africa” crossed my mind multiple times a day and I was grateful to God that He allowed me to come to this place and help serve these people. He also allowed me to not get so caught up with the questions of “what are You teaching me here? what am I supposed to take away from this trip?” but rather to live each day to the full for His glory and to serve the Oromo people whole-heartedly. Whether I was in the clinic performing malaria tests or checking expectant mother’s bellies to tell them how far along in their pregnancy’s they were …hanging out with the Smith’s girls…walking around the Langano compound…slaughtering cows or blowing up termite mounds…visiting patients in their homes and being served a meal…going to a funeral and attending a wedding, or simply fellowshipping with the team, I recognized a heart of thanksgiving and a heart of repentance within me. On one hand, I was thankful that God had allowed me to be born in America and to have the education and skills that I have in order to come to this poverty-stricken land to bring hope and help to a people in need. But somehow, at the same time, I was keenly aware of my own selfishness, of my own overindulgence in American culture, and my own idleness in the states of how I spend my time.

Returning home, I have found many emotions surfacing as they come in like tides of the ocean, with their highs and lows, never knowing when they may hit me. I awoke the morning after we returned and while I laid there, I was struck with the idea that I had just slept in MY bed that I own, in my air-conditioned Dallas apartment that I spend too much rent on…but that there were these images and smells that I couldn’t get out of my mind of the land I had just seen, the living conditions of the people there, the people and their hospitality, and of the medical help we were able to provide. As I thought upon these things, I felt the Lord speak His truth over me, that the God we serve is so much bigger than we can imagine, that He is so holy, and just, and righteous, and worthy of our praise. Even though my heart is torn and confused during this time of re-entry, I rest knowing that I will always have a heart for the nations now and I am so thankful for how the Lord has changed my perspective. He is worthy of our time and efforts. He is worthy to be served. He is beautiful.

Recap: I fail...

I TOTALLY forgot about the event that got us going, bright and early on Saturday morning. Allyson, prior to our arrival, purchased a cow for the wedding and the rest of the week. So on Saturday morning, we woke up 30 minutes early to go Old Testament on this livestock. The cow, understandably so, was late to the event. But Justin, the man of the hour, was a patient man...it gave him more time to sharpen his knife. Pirtle kindly held his alternatives, in case something went wrong. But that would later prove to be a poor decision on his part. We brought the cow to the an open area of grass by the kitchen. After hog tying it and tucking its tail, they said a prayer over it, Avatar style. Then we waited in anticipation for the green light to begin the slicing. They carefully stretched out the neck skin so that Justin would have a good, tight surface to cut into. Once he started he got through the first layer, then stopped, early. He got back after it and cut the trachea and stopped early again. He continued on until he almost got to the spine. That's when the blood started flowing. It was at this point that I started thinking back to all the Levitical laws of slaughtering the offering and how this was a daily occurrence. But my reminiscing was cut short when Bessie started to breathe. You could hear the air flowing in and out with a bit of gurgling to it.

This is when Pirtle having the sharp objects became a poor decision. I'm pretty sure the amount of blood that came out of the cow had also dropped down from Pirtle's head. He was whiter than Casper. He managed to mumble out, "I've gotta go sit down" as his wide eyed face slowly looked the other direction and began to move. Thankfully, his wife, Heather, thought it best he not carry the knives and took them out of his hands. In a tunnel-visioned daze, he took a seat beyond earshot of the soon to be sirloin.

What seemed like forever, turned out to be just a few minutes. And just like that, we had dinner for the rest of the week! It was a cool experience to see how they survive out there. There's not a Tom Thumb to drive to within a few thousand miles of where they are, so they have to do the job themselves. Thankfully, Justin didn't poorly represent us inept Americans by cutting off an udder or something. And we were able to eat well for the rest of the week.

Recap: The Wedding

I've been delaying on writing this post. There was so much that went on during our first Sunday at in Ethiopia that I was a little overwhelmed with trying to recap it. But I can delay it no longer. So here goes (I apologize if this one is a little long)...

Saturday night brought on a pretty amazing thunderstorm. I really miss those storms. They're reminiscent of a Texas thunderstorm with the loud thunder and lighting and heavy rains. But the rain falls straight down, which allowed us to leave our windows open. (This wasn't a big deal at first, but towards the end of the trip, our room was getting pretty stanky. So good ventilation was a MUST). We didn't really think much of it until the next morning when Shane walked up in a suit, wearing high water rubber boots and a rain parka. He came bearing news that the road to get out of camp was now a free flowing river and that 2 cars full of wedding attendees were stuck in it. So Victoria, Yonas and I loaded up with Shane, along with Aberra (the groom) and some other folks that were looking for rides to the church. Along the way to pull the 2 cars out, we also ran into another car whose battery died. But we had to prioritize and wished them good luck as we drove past. Once we came upon the 2 cars (a land cruiser and a mini-van), we realized they were REALLY stuck, as in they were bottoming out on the road that was now just a path of flooded potholes. Some places, the water came up to my knees. (The thought had crossed my mind to question what might be floating in the water, which is now bathing my legs and filling my sandals with sediment. But I decided it best I know think too long, lest I vomit at the options.) The cool thing about this event was that as I stood on the banks of the former road, I looked around at the crowd that had amassed. The young and old, rich and poor, Americans and Ethiopians, naked and suits...we were all there trying to help. It truly was an entire village rallying together. The best part was that I could look across the river and see a couple naked children standing beside a man in a suit and tie, standing beside a boy with a suit jacket and no pants, sitting beside a boy with a sweater on, standing beside a white guy in a suit and tie and parka and rain boots, standing beside an Ethiopian with a machette in his hands. It was such a great mix! After a couple of hours, an extra landcruise, some metal cables, a walk through a cow pasture (aka lake of poo-water), and Yoni almost falling into the river in his suit, we got the 2 cars out. How they managed to get to the church, I'm still not clear on, but mission accomplished. Now on to the wedding festivities...a couple hours late.

Ethiopia weddings aren't quite like the western weddings that we're used to. They are ALL DAY celebrations. And I mean CELEBRATIONS. The bride and groom go to separate locations and they have some kind of service/celebration there and a meal. So we started off with Aberra at the Langano church. We were a little late, so people were a little frazzled waiting for Shane and Yonas to come back from finishing up with the river situation. It wasn't too bad, but Victoria, on the video camera, and I didn't know what was going on, nor could we understand anything that anyone was saying. Once shane and Yoni got there, everyone loaded into the vehicles. V and I got to sit in the back of the truck that was leading the way. Our job was to document the entire trip, which we thought would SURELY be less than 2 hours. Wrong. For the first 30 minutes or so, we did the best we could to detail the 8 or so trucks driving in a line, honking horns, singing, yelling, etc. But given the horrid condition of the road, a lot of our time was spent trying not to lose a rib when the truck bed decided to jump at us.

Along the way, we came upon another little township with a ditch going through it. Our truck, being the lead, crossed over the small land bridge that lead to the other side. Once across, however, one of the town folk started digging up the bridge, much to the dismay of the passengers in the cab of our truck. So they ran out after him and threw the guy down. This started quite the commotion. While I'm sure it was a tense situation for them, V and I were stuck, by ourselves, in the back of a truck, with lots of expensive equipment, cut off from anyone else that spoke English and being surrounded more and more by the townspeople wanting our stuff, all the while a little scuffle is going on about 30 yards from us. I was pretty nervous just for us westerners. I'm not sure what happened that allowed the rest of the trucks to pass through (I think one of the missionaries paid someone off), but once Shane and his car arrived, we wanted nothing more than to jump inside his safe-haven-on-wheels. It helped that our driver in the truck told V that she was pregnant and didn't need to be riding in the back of a truck. Then we were back on our way.

I wish I could detail out the scenery of the drive to where the bride was. It was absolutely breathtaking. I would love to have a little cottage out underneath the 60ft canopy of forrest. But this blog is already getting too long. So I'll recap the rest of the drive like this: Groom's car ran out of gas; V and I get back into the truck bed to document the arrival of the party, Mulatu (preacher) is singing and dancing and preaching to the public from the same truck bed we're in, then almost falls out when the truck moves abruptly. A local boy shows us how to get to the bride's house, then begins to hit on V and puts his arm around her. As the trip leader, I felt it my responsibility to step in and let the boy know that I owned her. That seemed to work.

Some of you may be wondering: What about the rest of the team? Well, I would love to tell you that Justin gave a message at the Langano church and they saw healings, the dead being raised to life, and 5000 souls coming to know the Lord. But I think the wedding pulled most of the congregation, so our team of 9 out numbered the 5 church attendees (including the translator). But from what I hear, Justin still brought the Word. After the service, the team got to work on making a bouquet, making the cake, and other wedding prep type stuff.

Anyways, once we arrived at the compound where Adonis (the bride) was, the 'band' showed up. Frainish (one of the nurses) and her drum led a procession of singers and dancers that escorted in the groom to a seating area in front of some older gentlemen (the bride's father and his gang, I suppose). There was a giving of dowry (lotta clothes and jewelry), a meeting of the 2 souls, some awkward pictures, then the feasting began...a memory forever scarred into my soul....

It's a sign of honor to be hand fed by someone in their culture. So I gave Otto Bruhanu (former camp director at Langano) a Gorsha. Evidently it was too small b/c Nico (one of the other guys we rode with) explained to me it had to be a big piece and proceeded to shove a fist sized piece of injera (imagine really sour crepes) and dorawat (meat and sauce) down my mouth. But "1 gorsha is for acquaintances, 2 is for friends, 3 is for family." So as soon as I swallowed the first massive handful, I found another one coming at me. And it's insulting to turn a gorsha down, so I just had to take it. Unfortunately, my gag reflexes didn't like it and a few pieces of injera came flying out from my clenching lips and through my nose. Everyone else had a good laugh. I think a little piece of me died inside. Thank God for Fanta Orange to help wash it down.

Well, after that, I don't remember much. There was an exchanging of rings, kissing of the elders, using an overflowing squatty potty, more dancing and singing, then a 2 hour drive back to Langano, but this time, with the whole bridal party. Once back at the compound, the band got out and did a little ditty around our car with Aberra and Adonis in it. And more dancing (including the graceful moves of Shane) escorted them into the meeting hall for another ceremony, officiated by Mulatu, and more eating. One of the cool things that they did, though, is the giving of gifts was a celebration as well. It was a way to honor the bride and groom. Then they cut the cake outside, after spraying confetti and silly string all over it, and the party really began. There was a good sized bonfire and the band started beating out some funky beats for the whole crew to get jiggy wid it. I didn't partake, however, Justin and Amanda got in the circle and pulled out some moves that made them famous around the surrounding areas.

All in all, it was the most amazing wedding any of us have ever been a part of, despite the atrocities that occurred on my gag reflex. I took a freezing cold shower that night and tried to get some rest amidst the nightmares of more gorshas. Up to this point, we've had 3 days in Ethiopia, and already we've been tossed into the fire of Ethiopian culture...and we're loving every minute of it. Sorry for the long post...it was a long day...

Recap: The Work Begins

I slept alright inside of my princess mosquito net (as it became known by). It was just a big net that fit a full bunk bed inside, but it draped in lovely fashion over the bed, making me look like female royalty. The team (including Amanda) would eventually change all of my sheets to pink and decorate it with appropriate princess decorations.

Anyways, this would be the first morning that we would get to experience Ethiopian coffee and tea. And it was...phenomenal. Most of the team had at least 2 cups per day, sometimes per meal. Maybe that's the norm, but I try to stay to a 5 cup max per week. But we would need the energy: our work had begun. The medical staff went to the clinic to begin training, then organizing and inventory-ing the medical supplies. Heather and Jessica got to hang back and help paint the kitchen. Meanwhile, the construction guys started work on the Beach House renovations. Justing, Victoria, and Robert went with Shane and Austin to attend a baptism service at the lake. Because of the nature of the baptisms, Shane only took a few of us to minimize the 'western' presence there. After another wonderful meal from Yeshi, the team began work on the school house that the girls do their lessons in. This was a surprise for Allyson b/c she needed a better place to teach.

That night the team watched a video on the Fistula Hospital in Addis. Unfortunately we were unable to make a visit to the hospital due to the wedding. But watching the video was heart wrenching. Hopefully we'll be able to make a visit on our next trip to Ethiopia ;-). If you don't know about this hospital, take a look here.

After the movie we helped decorate a little bit for the wedding, and I was able to have a good conversation with Shane. I don't remember everything that was said, but I just remember that after the conversation, the Smiths wouldn't leave my prayers. And I don't mean that in a bad way, rather, a connection was made that would tie me to that family. And the only way I know how to continue to support this family best is through prayer.

So there's not too much to tell about Saturday. It was just a day of working, cold showers, great coffee, and budding friendships.

back to the life we left ...

Well, I've been back from Africa for over a week now. The trip was amazing ... I fell in love with Africa, I fell in love with the people of Ethiopia, and surprisingly ... I fell in love with a new way of life that I wasn't expecting. 

We landed in Addis, the capital on Thursday night after 25 hours of travel. Over the next 3 days, we were go-go-go ... going to a lixo (funeral), eating dinner in an Ethiopian hut, going to African church, preparing for a wedding, unpacking a TON of medications and supplies for the clinic, GOING to an African wedding ... all the while trying to sleep in a bed about 2 inches too short for me, and showers about 10 degrees too cold for me. 

There are so many stories to tell from each of the above ... but the wedding was the coolest! Seriously ... imagine the following. Before the bridal party arrived by caravan, several guests show up in eager anticipation. And then ... the first car comes into sight. Franish, a tall, slender, meek (remember this ... meek, I tell you) African woman grabs a drum about 2 feet in length and about 1 foot in diameter, slings the strap around her neck, and begins to beat both ends of the drum. As she is beating, she starts singing ... then she starts screaming ... after each line, the remaining guests begin to gather around Franish, repeating back to her the lines she just sang. As they gather, they begin to sway ... hunching down just a bit at the waist, and moving their hips, and swinging their hands from side to side. As the cars pull up, the bridal party pours out and begin to join the crowd ... the bride and groom stay in the car for just a moment longer. Now, the pastor in the community, Mulatu, begins to sing with Franish. The crowd gets more and more into their celebration, stomping their feet, jumping up and down, screaming as loud as they can. 

Now ... imagine us white people ... standing behind this crowd ... awestruck from the awesomeness that is happening before our very eyes. Get this, though ... the more and more they get into it ... I begin to feel the earth beneath me shake!!! It was crazy ... and I loved every second of it! The next 6 to 7 hours was part ceremony/part PARTY!!! We ended the night dancing around a bonfire until there was nothing left except for orange ambers.

The next day was Monday ... the first day at clinic. I have to confess, I was worried. Allyson had been emailing us for months to brush up on our infectious disease and tropical medicine. Short story even shorter ... I didn't do any kind of brushing of medical books. We took a tour of the clinic on Sunday morning. Allyson tried to explain how the work would flow ... and I was getting that gnawing feeling in the pit of my stomach, knowing this was going to be bad. So Monday comes, we meet the staff of Ethiopian nurses, translators, and the like ... and we are broken up into groups. I am paired with Allyson, Victoria, and Nwagwo (pronounced Na-gow). Allyson says she will see the first patient so we can see how it's run ... and as the first patient walks in, Nwagwo asks them what is going on ... as the story unfolds ... I know what is going on. The gnawing feeling goes away, and I slip right into medicine mode ... un ... be ... lievable. I take the next patient ... and then on the next ... Allyson looks at me and says, "Josh ... are you interested in doing missions?" 

Do you ever have one of those moments, where you don't know whether to cry or vomit or laugh or lose control of all bodily functions ... picture me ... in that dilemma.

"I have thought about missions ..." I replied.

"You know ... we have an opening here in Langano ..." Allyson retorted.

I still don't know what to do with that ... mostly because it was so honoring, and humbling ... and maybe because I felt like my desire for missions had always been just that ... my desire ... never something that was a possibility or in the will of the Lord for me ... but here it was ... sweet, simple, but huge ... an invite into the mission field. 

Over the week I would see malaria, malnutrition, mastitis, anthrax (possibly?!?!) conjunctivitis, leprosy and then things I am used to ... allergies, arthritis, coughs, etc. It was so natural though ... frustrating at times as well. In Langano, there are 3 different languages spoken - Am-haric, Oromo, and English ... and so there is the patient who speaks Oromo, the translator that speaks all the, but primarily Am-haric (I think), and then me ... speaking only English me. 

It was one of the greatest weeks of my life ...

As a whole, the trip did not radically change my view of God or my relationship with Him. Instead, it was very reaffirming. I felt like the whole time I was there, He would reaffirm certain desires of my heart and reaffirm much of the work He has done in recent months in my own heart. But He also gave me words ... in recent months and years, even, I have had this angst inside of me ... desires I could not express, or a discontentment , or unsettledness ... whatever it was, I believe I have words now to express those desires ... ready for them??? 

I love medicine ... I love that the Lord has blessed me with an amazing education, and a profession that can be used to change and help so many lives. And now, He has given me a direction ... NOT Africa, necessarily ... but a direction as a whole. This gift has been given to me not to terminate on myself, but to help those who need it ... and those who can't get it. I don't know what that looks like ... but it is going to be an amazing ride figuring it out!!!

Recap: Hello, Langano.

Shane left right after breakfast with Justin and Robert to pick up some supplies for the camp. The rest of us took a land cruiser and van to Langano. The 4 hour drive from Addis to Langano brought a stark shift in economic status and cultural norms. Addis is a very westernized, capitol city with very western clothing, dance clubs, bars, restaurants, and plenty of shopping. Not too long after we got out of the city, roads stop having names, dresses became a requirement for women, pants became optional for youth, and there were often more animals in the road than cars. This was all a welcome change to the constant distractions of technology and over-packed schedules.

Towards the end of our drive, we turned off of the nice, paved roads onto a red dirt road, surrounded on both sides with lush green vegetation, mud huts with thatched roofs, and semi naked youths running beside the cars, screaming hello and asking for handouts. We eventually came upon a freight container that was being used as a bridge. This was the entrance to the Langano camp grounds. We had to get out and unload the luggage from on top of our land cruiser so that it could fit through the container. So we walked the rest of the way (a little over a mile).

The walk was surreal. We entered a jungle of sorts with black and white, shaggy calabas monkeys jumping in the trees, birds of every color flying around, warthogs sun bathing in the field, dic dic (small antelope) quickly evading any sightings. We were in Africa!

Life didn't slow down a lot from there. We unloaded bags, got our rooms set up, had a tour of the camp, helped with a pregnant lady with respiratory problems, attended a funeral, visited the hospital, and met the camp staff in various fashions. Heather and Victoria helped with the pregnant lady and went with her to the hospital while some of the other guys were the token firenges (foreigners) at the waiting benches. Half of our group went with Shane and Yonas (the camp director and my favorite Ethiopian staffer) to the funeral, while Austin and I went with Allyson and Laura (community health worker) later on.

The funeral wasn't like I expected. Laura eventually got us there after almost tipping over the truck and driving through a few people's fields. But there wasn't the screaming and crying and wailing, like I experienced in Sudan. Rather, it was a pretty low key hang out. The 4 of us firenges just sat on a bench and stared at the widower. Laura and Allyson brought some medicines for the widower b/c he had a blood clot in his leg that he was supposed to get treated when his wife died. After a long awkward staring contest, Laura and Allyson convinced Galeto (the widower) to receive the treatments. Then they invited us to eat, much to Allyson's dread.

Maybe it was the build up from Allyson, maybe it was my palette, but the food wasn't too bad. They just brought out a pot full of what looked like mushy chorizo, and surprisingly, tasted like mushy chorizo. I would've loved to of had some tortillas and picante sauce right then. But soon, the amount of butter used in this dish started to weigh me down, and we left to finish up our day at the camp.

We were able to end the night with some great spaghetti made by the camp cook, Yeshi, and pray over Shane and his family. It was a great start to the week, and an appropriate pre-cursor to the events ahead.

Recap: Arrival in Addis

So the 15 hour flight to Ethiopia with a 45 minute stop in Rome was LOOOOOONG. What made it less long: watching this happen over and over again (That's Josh in the background laughing with us):

So we got into the Addis Airport Friday evening, local time. Nothing too exciting happened, which is a good thing in Africa. When we finally got our luggage and started heading out, we were warmly greeted by Shane, Moses (his 5 yr old Zambian son), Austin Mann (amazing photographer/friend that was stranded in Ethiopia b/c of the Volcano), and Amanda Goble friend/former neighbor that was hanging with the Smiths for a month while the Mendonsas in Kenya were home in America). It took a few minutes for Moses to finally warm up, and the first thing he says to me: "Paul Golangco?" I, being shocked that he knew my first and last name, replied, "Yes, Moses?".

"Are you Chinese?"

"..............Yes, Moses."

"Paul Golangco?"

"Yes, Moses?"

"Can I have some gum?" "Sure, Moses."

And thus started the continuing relationship between Mo and I. Evidently he was on a big China kick, so he was very curious about the whole country. I later found out that he was having nightmares of Chinese people attacking him, so I'm not sure why he has this fascination.

Anyways, we spent the night in Addis at the SIM guest house. It was our last taste of warm water for a while. So we soaked it in. But another lesson I've learned: never bed check the beds in Africa. Bed checking is where you see how comfortable a bed is by flopping down, belly flop style, onto the bed. I did this in Sudan and in Ethiopia, and both times there was a loud and painful THUD that sounded once my face planted on the mattress. Regardless, a warm shower and a horizontal bed were a welcome comfort after the long trip. I slept well for the few hours between the night club next door shutting down and the 4am Call to Pray. The next day, we would make the 4 hour drive down to Langano to usher in a slew of memories that won't be soon forgotten.

Recap: Travelling out of Country

As I said in the previous post, we hit a small snag at the ticket counter. Imagine 11 relatively young international travelers, each with 2 50lb bags and 2 30lb carry on bags, weighing each bag and adjusting weight as necessary. Then imagine them all getting in line to check in for a 25+ hour journey to Ethiopia. And as they all proceed to the self check-in terminals, they each individually find out that their records cannot be found, and they are directed to wait for a live United Airlines employee to assist them. Now imagine you're that employee. If that were me, I'd be getting a little frazzled at the sight of this scatterbrained and loquacious crew.

The night before, I was over at the Pirtle's place, watching them pack (and taking my mind off of the millions of possibilities of things that could go wrong) while rambling off the random thoughts that came to mind. One of those thoughts, spoken out loud, was that our group was missing that cheesy, schmoozer type personality that oozed charm and made friends with everyone he/she ever met. That's when both Steven and Heather stopped and looked at me. Evidently the reason I couldn't see that person was b/c it was me. So fast forward a few hours, and you find me standing at the ticket counter, fully embracing this new revelation and hamming it up with the lady behind the computer, trying to make sure she doesn't mark us all up to be cavity searched at the security line. She was the first of many airline employees that we would have to deal with trying to get to and from Ethiopia. It worked and we made it on board safe and sound.

Once we got to Dulles Airport, we faced a new challenge. Evidently, Ethiopian Airlines has a 15lb limit on carry-ons, unspecified on their website. Not only that, but Aasif was the attendant at the gate that would be checking us in and he was an unfriendly, black and white rule follower with a thick accent. As we waited in line, I prayed that I wouldn't get him, but if I did, that we'd be in his good graces. But as more and more fliers made it in front of him, the less likely it was looking that he would be in a good mood if/when I got there. Sure enough, when I got to the front of the line, Aasif called me past the red line that I was NOT supposed to cross until he was ready for me. I flashed a smile, tried to be as friendly as possible and hoped he would be easy on me. It didn't work. $60, he tells me, is the fee I owe to get my carry on checked in. It would be the fee that every one of the team would need to pay. So I talked to him a little about it all, and we were able to get away with only checking 7 of the 20ish bags. He and the other 'gate keeper' also let us slide with the weight limit a little bit. By the end of it, Aasif actually upgraded me to 1st Class!!! Not really, but I admit that I tried. He did however give me an exit seat. But I turned it down...I'm not sure why.

So after all that, we finally made it on board Ethiopian Airlines, ready for a 15 hour plane ride to Addis Ababa. I'll have to give you a review of Ethiopian Air later b/c there are stories to be told there. But this post has gotten long enough.

Paul G

Recap: Pre-Trip Preparations

It's amazing how quickly 3 months turns into 3 weeks. It wasn't too long ago that I remember Matt asking me to take charge of this trip, and now I'm making 2-3 long trips up to Flower Mound to get the final details taken care of. I knew from the get-go that I was going to have to rely solely on the Lord's provisions to lead this team well. Somehow or another, in the last 3 weeks, I managed to neglect that idea and tried to tighten my fist around anything and everything to make sure I was in control. I wrestled and fought and exhausted myself trying to be this superman leader that would wow the church leadership and everyone else that was watching. It still amazes me how quickly I forget the Lord's commands and promises. Even to the last night as I prayed that the Lord would help me let go and trust in Him, I felt the weight of anxiety fall on me, thinking that I was going to screw up, that I forgot some major detail, that I was missing some document, or that I didn't think about some obscure, yet essential part of the trip. But in His grace God gave me peace and helped finally find rest. The next morning I showed up at the airport without a worry b/c I knew God had everything taken care of, even as the people at the check-in counter couldn't pull up our records (next recap). There wasn't anything I could more to get ready for the trip, so it was easier to let go of control when I knew I've done what I could, and there was nothing more I could do. The way I started the preparations was the same way I ended the preparations: Trusting in God. I faltered and fell a few times along the way, but His grace brought me back. As any kind of leader, this was an important lesson to learn. And I'm glad I realized it before embarking on this adventurous journey where we would face any number of situations that challenged our idea of control.

the trip of a lifetime!

So we just got back from AFRICA!!!  We had such a great time!  I could not have asked for a better team!  We laughed, some of us cried, and all of us had our paradigms completely shaken and shifted about who the Lord is and His abounding steadfast love for us.  Over the next few days we will begin to post personal stories … stories of things that happened, stories about internal struggles AND victories, and eventually stories of new perspectives, hearts, and the process of re-entry.  So, I hope you enjoy our stories ... I hope the Lord moves in your heart for personal insight, but more than that, I hope that in our stories, He awakens a love and a passion for His children who are lost across the earth ... and a desire to see them come to know the sweetest and greatest love anyone has ever  known …

 

Psalm 67

 1GOD BE merciful and gracious to us and bless us and cause His face to shine upon us and among us--Selah [pause, and calmly think of that]!—

 2That Your way may be known upon earth, Your saving power (Your deliverances and Your salvation) among all nations.

 3Let the peoples praise You [turn away from their idols] and give thanks to You, O God; let all the peoples praise and give thanks to You.

 4O let the nations be glad and sing for joy, for You will judge the peoples fairly and guide, lead, or drive the nations upon earth. Selah [pause, and calmly think of that]!

 5Let the peoples praise You and give thanks to You, O God; let all the peoples praise and give thanks to You!

 6The earth has yielded its harvest [in evidence of God's approval]; God, even our own God, will bless us.

 7God will bless us, and all the ends of the earth shall reverently fear Him.

 

- josh